Bring on the Suck

I have to mention, because it really needs to be said: What the fuck was Weezer thinking when they came out with “Raditude”???

This album sucks for a number of reasons that I hope someone reads. Firstly, it’s so cliched in so many ways. Reach for the top? Love is the answer? I’m so used to slightly mischievous and slightly bad ass nerd rock from times of olde, so when I actually listened to this album, I was really disheartened at just how bad it was. Not only was it cliched, but they used terrible folky chant rhythms for some of it, trite lyrics (as mentioned) and horrible slang that did nothing but to prove that a whole bunch of white guys can sound actually really ridiculous, and somehow make money from it. I don’t venture a guess that they made a lot of money from a song about ‘hanging with their homies’ or ‘when I used to play b-ball.’

What the album does serve to do is date them. Quite badly, actually. It made me feel embarrassed for my age bracket, and it made me embarrassed for them, because they’re older than me, and obviously striving to achieve a “cougar-esque” sound. That’s exactly what it made me think of, “cougars”, or stale M.I.L.F.’s that still dress like Brittany Spears.

This is terribly degrading, but there are only two songs that I find redeemable on the whole album. The first one, “If you’re wondering if I want you to”, is awesome. I love it. The other one was “Love is the Answer”. Completely trite message, but they managed to get some scimitar (??) and some Indian music into the mix that I thought was more their usual creative pace. The rest of it is just a lot of hot garbage though, unfortunately, which I find really really upsetting. This album could be their absolute demise. The absolute only thing I could think of to rationalize some of the choices they made is that they have smoked a little too much weed, and this is the product of some super fried times, reminiscent of that trippy album that nobody liked that the Beatles came out with (mid-Yoko, but I could be wrong). The other thing I thought of, was maybe this was a satire about how music that is somewhat reminiscent of the Beatles would no longer fly in our time with the ‘youth of today’, specifically my generation of Weezer fans. I think this is altogether too optimistic though. If meant to be ironic, it would be  hilarious, but if it was, it also falls flat on its fucking face, quicker than a fat kid with untied shoelaces. You idiots!

Tomorrow I’m going to listen to the Red Album for the first time. Hopefully that goes better.